Happy May!

Today I was thinking of the saying “April showers bring May flowers”. That saying doesn’t really fit for Florida weather (as there really hasn’t been any rain to speak of), which is where I am currently but it definitely fits for Vancouver’s weather. May is a time for new beginnings, the sun is warming, flowers are starting to bloom, birds are chirping and the garden is showing signs of growth. May is also Women’s Health Month. What will you do this month to take care of yourself?

For me, taking care of myself and working my program of recovery are two in the same. I heard someone recently share that recovery is simply taking good care of myself in all areas of my life; physically, emotionally, mentally, socially and spiritually. Am I looking after my physical body? Am I looking after my emotional health? How are my relationships? Do I follow a daily spiritual practice? In order for me to truly look after myself, I need to take care of my whole being. If one pillar of my foundation is shaky then truly my whole being is off kilter. The scary part is that I may not even notice I have a shaky pillar until all four of my pillars are in jeopardy and then I am in a pretty desperate situation. The good news is that it now doesn’t take much for me to get back on track and once again, be in a place of positively moving forward.

It’s vital for me, especially as an addict in recovery, to take a pulse check often of how I’m doing in all areas of my life as it is very easy for me to slip back into poor self-care. Recently, I learned a new tool called a Recovery Grid created by Roland Williams. The details of how to use the grid are a different topic (a great topic but a different newsletter) however I thought the healthy living checklists were brilliant. I have shared them in the box below so you can assess how you are doing with self-care. This is by no means so that we can judge and be critical of ourselves. It’s just a great checkpoint. For me, I need as many tools as I possibly can have in my tool belt to help me be honest and see if I am on track. I lived so much of my life being in dishonesty with myself that I truly often can’t see the truth.

Take a look at the grid below and notice the things you are doing and notice what you’re not doing. Would the things you are not doing be beneficial for your personal recovery and well – being? If so, what commitments are you willing to make around doing these things? Remember that small changes are much more attainable than lofty grandiose commitments that we actually never end up doing and then get to feel bad about ourselves for not doing (I know this one well).

As I have been writing this article, I have taken note of areas that I haven’t been focusing on and I can definitely tell there are several. Under my physical health, I really haven’t been doing any consistent exercise lately. Exercise is something I either seem to do full on or not at all (an addict…you think?). Recently, I have been in the not at all part of the compulsion. So about 2 weeks ago I committed to taking a 30-minute walk every day. I’m pretty sure I haven’t missed a day. My mind can easily tell me all sorts of negative things about this like; 30-minute walk – that’s nothing, you should be running, what about cardio…and the chatter continues.  The important thing here is that I took a look at what I am and what I am not doing to look after myself which allows me to then get honest and make changes that support my long-term health physically, mentally, socially and spiritually. And that my friends is a beautiful piece of recovery…that I actually can take a look, get honest and make commitments (that I actually keep) to move towards recovery and away from relapse or towards health and away from the disease. That is a miracle.

Would love to hear what you will do to look after yourself in the month of May (men too).


Biologicaly – Physically

  •  Do I follow a healthy eating plan
  • Am I getting enough sleep
  • Do I get adequate exercise
  • Heath Care Provider: do you have one, do you go, do you follow what they suggest
  • Do I have good hygiene
  • Do I avoid toxic substances: caffeine, tobacco, sugar…etc 
 Psychologically – Thoughts/Feelings

  • Do I regularly see a therapist/coach/counsellor
  • Can I identify and express my feelings
  • What is my stress level
  • Do I have good self – esteem
  • Do I think positively for the most part
  • Do I intellectually challenge myself regularly

Socially – Relationships 

  • Romantic relationship – can I be in one, am I able to love someone and let them love me back
  • If I am currently in a romantic relationship is it strong in all areas: commitment, intimacy, passion
  • Friends: do I have any, if so what kind – do they lift me up or bring me down
  • Family: do I have healthy relationships with my family members
  • Do I have fun
  • If in recovery do I have a strong sober support system: recovery group, partners in recovery, sponsor
  • How is my relationship with myself: do I enjoy my own company
Spiritually

  • If I belong to an organized religion do I follow the practices
  • Do I believe in a Higher Power and if so do I build that relationship daily
  • Do I live my according to my values: honesty, compassion, tolerance, respect, humility, integrity

 

 

 

 

 

The start of summer is a busy time at ACORN. Today, we start a Primary Intensive in Florida, followed by a week of Living In Recovery and a Step 4-9 Alumni weekend to finish it off. In June we have a Primary Intensive starting June 8th in Vancouver, followed by a Relapse Prevention Alumni Weekend (I think there is waiting room only for this left?) and then a week of Living In Recovery. There are many events that could be part of your self-care plan.

Wishing you a happy, healthy, sober May.

Peace & Abstinence, Amanda

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